Have you ever found yourself wondering how the Radio Times described Red Dwarf when first broadcast? Well wonder no more as, with a little help from BBC Genome, Gazpacho Soup is here to bring you this vital information. As with many online tools, this relies on community contributions to remain accurate and reflect what was printed in the magazine and therefore some mad bastards might have made some unhelpful edits. If you spot any inaccuracies from your original copies of the Radio Times from early 1988, do send them in and we’ll amend accordingly.
The End
Broadcast Date: Monday, 15th February 1988
Radio Times issue 3350 Page 41
First of six episodes by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor
A comedy series set in space
Starring Chris Barrie as Arnold Rimmer, BSC, SSC, Craig Charles as Dave Lister, Danny John-Jules as Cat.
The mining ship Red Dwarf is an old tramp steamer mining around the moons of Saturn. It’s five miles long and three miles wide, with a crew of 169. Within 24 hours, 168 of them will be dead.
Now this is somewhat fascinating. Did the cast list really credit Rimmer with his swimming certificates? That is a niche reference for the first ever outing of a show, especially when that joke doesn’t appear in the episode in question. Could somebody Tweet the relevant page of the Radio Times so we can check?
And this? Neither do I. #Reddwarf30 pic.twitter.com/qPJaMRnBle
— Doug Naylor (@DougRDNaylor) February 15, 2018
Thanks Doug. So Genome is wrong about one thing; Danny John-Jules is not credited as Cat but rather as ‘?’. It’s great that they’re trying to keep some mystery. Also noteworthy is no credit for Norman Lovett with the regular cast but he is in the ‘Contributors’ section as a guest star.
While apparently few watched the first episode, it did get a nice bit of promotion in the form of an image or rather, two images. They couldn’t have used that image with them standing beside each other? If you’re struggling to see the caption, it reads: ‘Are Arnold Rimmer (Chris Barrie) and Dave Lister (Craig Charles) made of the right stuff? Watch this space…’.
The synopsis itself is pretty strange. The ship will never again be described as “an old tramp steamer” (other than by Phillip Schofield) but it sort of makes sense. It’s good they’ve got the ship’s measurements in though, isn’t it? Given the limited space, it doesn’t seem like a crucial detail. Then again, it makes the tiny crew of 169 seem even stranger. The mention of everyone being dead before the end of the episode really sells the comedy though, and is actually a bit spoiler heavy. What makes Danny playing a character called Cat more of a spoiler than mentioning the entire crew get wiped out? It’s worse than Twitter after a Netflix release. How much more satisfying would it have been to see Lister emerge from stasis with no clue anyone was dead? It’s probably a bit late to worry about that now.
Future Echoes
Broadcast Date: Monday, 22nd February 1988
Radio Times issue 3351, page 49
A comedy series set in space starring Chris Barrie as Arnold Rimmer, BSC, SSC, Craig Charles as Dave Lister, Danny John-Jules as Cat, Norman Lovett as Holly
Having accelerated constantly for three million years, Red Dwarf breaks the light barrier. Rimmer and Lister overtake themselves in time and witness images from the future. Then Rimmer sees Lister die.
Rimmer: ‘How old are you now?’
Lister: ’25. How old did I look?’
Rimmer: ‘Mid-20s.’
Things have certainly developed since last week. We now we have a credit for Norman Lovett, so that’s nice. The synopsis works quite well too for the most part. You can’t help but wonder if they might have ended it with ‘images from the future’ before going into spoiler territory. And did the Radio Times really print dialogue? It’s a nice exchange and makes sense in the context but still, it seems…odd.
Balance of Power
Broadcast date: Monday, 22nd February 1988
Radio Times issue 3352, page 40
by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor
A comedy series set in space.
Lister wants to go on a date with dead console officer, Christine Kochanski, and Rimmer’s woken up with somebody else’s arm.
This leap year listing is short and sweet and describes things that happen but I’m not sure that it really gets to the heart of the episode. Also the use of the contraction for ‘Rimmer has’ to ‘Rimmer’s’ is deeply confusing on a first read. It makes sense that Rimmer IS woken up but then comes the ‘with’ and you have to rethink the whole thing. Of note, in the cast list, Tony Hawks is credited as Trout a la creme, having been named Dispensing machine in the previous episode.
Waiting for God
Broadcast date: Monday, 7th March 1988
Radio Times issue 3353, page 37
by Rob Grant, Doug Naylor
Starring Chris Barrie as Arnold Rimmer, BSC, SSC, Craig Charles as Dave Lister, Danny John-Jules as Cat, Norman Lovett as Holly
Lister discovers some startling facts when he learns to read cat writing.
Lister: ‘They don’t use marks they use smells.’
Rimmer: ‘You ought to try reading your T-shirt.’
This is suitably vague. We seem very far away from the revealing synopses of the first couple of episodes. It’s fair to assume that the Radio Times in 1988 wouldn’t really want to get into the potential blasphemy of naming Lister as God.
We have some more dialogue here, except this time, it isn’t actually dialogue but rather a paraphrasing. True, Lister does say that line before following it up with: ‘You run your nose along the line and all the different smells are released. It’s really good.’ There’s then a further exchange before Rimmer retorts with: ‘You ought to try reading your shirt sometime, Lister. It’s probably a novel by Victor Hugo.’ Where do these synopsis writers get off on their paraphrasing? It just feels a little disingenuous and what purpose does it actually serve? They’ve made their own joke which doesn’t really reflect the dialogue from the show. It just doesn’t really seem necessary.
Confidence and Paranoia
Broadcast date: Monday, 14th March 1988
Radio Times issue 3354, page 41
by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor
A comedy series set in space starring Chris Barrie as Arnold Rimmer, BSC, SSC, Craig Charles as Dave Lister, Danny John-Jules as Cat, Norman Lovett as Holly
Lister contracts a mutated form of pneumonia, and has hallucinations which become solid.
There’s something delightful about the Radio Times using Rimmer’s inept description to explain the events of the episode. They don’t say that Lister’s hallucinations appear in the real world or that they come to life. No, they become solid.
Me2
Broadcast date: Monday, 21st March 1988
Radio Times issue 3355, page 36
Last of six episodes by Rob Grant and Doug Naylor
A comedy series set in space starring Chris Barrie as Arnold Rimmer, BSC, SSC, Craig Charles as Dave Lister, Danny John-Jules as Cat, Norman Lovett as Holly
Tonight’s special guest star Chris Barrie as Arnold Rimmer 2
Now that Rimmer’s discovered how to duplicate himself, he decides to leave the quarters he shares with Lister, and moves in with himself.
Yeah, that seems about right. They’re really dedicated to the gag about Chris Barrie being a special guest star. He’s listed twice in the cast list a little further down the page. Those hilarious japesters.
Well, that’s your lot. BBC Genome really is a wonderful time capsule and we’re lucky to have such a fascinating resource available. Thanks to everyone who works on it. Perhaps we’ll open up the vaults again soon.